I absolutely love this time of the year. The biting cold is the perfect weather for taking a walk, especially if there are Christmas decorations to go see. AND winter walks mean fun jackets to keep out the biting cold…
We get jackets too but they aren’t as fun as the doggies. Arya kind of looks like a turtle, but don’t tell her that or she might never wear it again.
But today I want to talk about where I was eight years ago….
Today, eight long years ago, I stood in front of a trailer, on a foggy evening talking to a tall blonde with deep blue eyes. We had met a year before that, dated for a short period of time and then settled into a comfortable friendship, well comfortable for me. I had just turned 20.
He wasn’t my type, he was awkward and wore collared shirts. He was shy and came from a family of sisters. He had spent a lot of time taking care of a sick mother. I had always leaned towards the bad boys that drove lifted trucks or lowered cars. I spent years rooting in mud, riding in the middle of a pick-up truck, attending car shows and drinking beer on a tailgate in the dark woods. I was a cheerleader in High School, I was a heart breaker, I was a small town girl who could out drive and drink most guys. I wasn’t looking for love, I had given up on finding love, I was looking for fun and finding it in all the wrong places.
That cold November morning, in my hometown by the ocean, this tall blonde had just spent Thanksgiving with my family and survived while my sister grilled him, my Mom played nice with him and my small tiny nephew threw balls at his face. I had stopped by his house, as I was heading back to the city I moved to in an attempt to run from who I used to be.
He wanted to go with me, just for a night, he offered to get a hotel room, I said yes. Then he got brave, he asked me out again, I said yes.
Possibly I was lonely, a small town girl in a big city and I wanted a companion. Possibly because I sensed that he was different than all the others. Possibly because that is how I always made my decisions, flying by the seat of my pants. Either way, I said yes, without much of a thought to the future.
When I said yes I didn’t know that it was about to change my life. I didn’t know a few weeks later we would start apartment hunting. I didn’t know that a little over a month later we would move in together with just a couch, futon and a bookshelf. I didn’t know that three months later he would take his family rings to a jeweler to size them. I didn’t know that six months later he would take me to play pool with a friend and get down on one knee in front of everyone there, asking me to marry him. I didn’t know I would say yes while complete strangers hooted and hollered. I didn’t know it would take two long years for us to even set a wedding date and that when we did get married it would be at a courthouse in a private setting because our families would never get along long enough for us to have a big wedding like we wanted. I didn’t know that we would be celebrating our fifth wedding anniversary this very year. I didn’t know that he would be cheering as I walked across a stage to receive my college diploma. I didn’t know that he would become my best friend or an uncle to my niece and nephew. I didn’t know that I would fall asleep with his arm resting on my hip every single night. I didn’t know he would become on of my biggest cheerleaders when it came to weight loss. I just didn’t know what that yes was really saying, I just figured it would be fun for a bit.
I lay in our beautiful bed, the one I saved for months to buy seven years ago, the one that now has a purple comforter and red sheets. I watch as the cat sleeps at the foot of the bed, the big dog sleeps on the floor by my side and the puppy monster sleeps in her bed. I look around our small home full of memories and a combination of his taste with mine. I try to remember who we used to be, those eight years ago and even though I remember glimpses, I know that we are so very different than them. I stare at our engagement photo, the only one we have and wonder what those two very young people were thinking all those years ago. We had such hot headed tempers and I still don’t remember what we fought about but I do remember the yelling. I remember my unwillingness to settle down at first and his frustration with my wild attitude. I remember how impulsive we used to be. BUT somewhere along the lines we grew up, lost those tempers or learned to control them, settled down and slowly became used to moving around each other in a comfortable dance that has been practiced for years. Somewhere along the lines we became best friends and his arm wrapped around me is as familiar to me as my own skin.
Eight years ago today, he asked a question, I said yes and that changed both of our lives. It isn’t a Romeo and Juliet story, but somehow I am okay with that!
What were you doing eight years ago today?