Why hello there…

I am back!

I pouted, I ranted and I sulked because of my horribly bad day on Tuesday
BUT then, I just decided to enjoy my time off and I spent two days eating amazingly good food (even dessert), spending lots of time with some awesome people and catching up on homework/errands. My toes are pretty from a pedicure, my legs hurt from some Tai Chi and my fingers are starting to turn purplish red from the cherries I am munching on. All in all, my attitude is adjusted, I feel better about the whole darn stinking Tuesday and I am ready to be over it. 
My big girl underoos are firmly in place.
I was reading my daily dose of Health.com (I seriously love the magazine) and stumbled upon a few interesting articles. One of my favorites was,  “Quitting smoking and eating fruits/veggies.” Made me feel better about the cherries I am eating today. 
This weekend is jammed packed full, tonight I am running with my Mom, Saturday I have a notary class (yawn) and Sunday we are hiking to one of our favorite waterfalls (puppies first time). 
I am slowly shaking the black cloud that has been hovering in the background.
When they diagnose you with a condition like mine (PCOS), they tell you all the medical stuff, they tell you to lose weight (but not how), they might even tell you some of the side effects or make suggestions on medications, if they are a good doctor that is. Some of my doctors left me completely in the dark and frustrated. The truth is, I did a LOT of research on my own to FINALLY come up with a plan of attack. 
My plan, simple, lose weight and change my lifestyle. It has been a slow painful process. Losing weight isn’t as easy for women with PCOS. We have to work harder, eat less and sometimes we can go too overboard (I am guilty of this), which causes worse problems. This whole time, you are battling exhaustion, fatigue, headaches, depression, infertility and random hairs that pop up in awkward places (just because they can). 
Explaining this condition to friends and family members who haven’t been through any of this, well it can be difficult. You yourself won’t 100% understand it. So while your friends are having kids, rushing forward with the next steps in their life, you will be struggling with this horrible condition.
But as I keep having to tell myself, it could be worse, there are far worse cases out there right now of children with cancer and sad sad stories. I know that I don’t have the worst case out there. 
But despite that, the truth is, the emotional toll that something like this takes on a person can be huge, you are basically in a war with your body. Your whole lifestyle will need to change. You will need to learn to cope with the side effects of having this condition. It will be a constant struggle between acceptance and anger. 
But I am shaking off that black cloud. I don’t want to be angry over something I can’t change but might be able to control. I made a promise to myself, I would no longer let PCOS live my life but instead live with PCOS. I am working hard to lose the excess weight with a little help from medication and learning a healthier lifestyle. 
I lost another pound this week, that makes 27 pounds so far in 6 months. Might not seem like a lot, but when it is this hard to lose weight, each pound feels like a victory of some sort. Take that PCOS! 
Any weekend plans? Any recent victories?


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